I Stand Amazed

So tonight I watched "Betrayal" and "Passion" from the "Bible" miniseries, the episodes in which (you may have guessed) Christ is betrayed, tortured, and crucified. First let me digress and say that I am kind of annoyed whenever I see an adaptation of any bible story, because when studying the passage afterwards one tends to think of the previously viewed image and it can taint/skew/prevent future insight. That being said, this adaptation was quite well done, and it got me meditating on Christ's death, and thinking...

Observe that Jesus wasn't weeping and sweating drops of blood over the crucifixion- that is, the actual, physical, horrendously painful death. We know this because numerous disciples of his would later go to equally gruesome deaths joyfully, sometimes with songs on their lips. Jesus wasn't any weaker-willed than these mortals; he had more to dread than the cross itself. He pleaded in Gethsemane for God to take away his Wrath, whatever huge and unknowable punishment was necessary to pay for the sins of the world. Christ went through SOMETHING during and/or after his death that we will never have to experience. This "something" involves unimaginably infinite pain that we will never be able to wrap our minds around, let alone relate with.

It's pretty crazy to think about because it seems that, in a lot of ways, the cross itself would be enough. What I mean is, if some guy went through that horribly tortuous experience (have you ever read about exactly how you die when crucified? It's not for the faint of stomach) and he said he did it FOR YOU, it would be pretty clear that he loved you a lot, wouldn't it? If he said, "go into all the world and tell them what I did for you," it would make SENSE to do so. Even if he was just a human being.

However, God's love is even more insane than that. He didn't just endure the cross, but he took some unimaginable punishment that we will never have to even taste. He didn't do it for one person, but for everyone! (Read that again: everyone!) Not only that, but after the fact, he rose again, having conquered death itself. THEN the Savior of the World says, "go into all the world and tell them what I did for you!" That's weighty!

When surveying the figurative cross (and the punishment, beyond the cross itself, which it represents), all of my troubles appear immensely unimportant. Complaining or suffering through this and that seems so ridiculous when I follow a God who personally endured immeasurably more for my own sake! His perfectly selfless act also makes all of my "good deeds" into rubbish... When the Bible says our good deeds look like rags to God, this is what it means! How DARE I claim to be a "good enough" person, good enough to enter Heaven, comparing my petty acts of kindness to Jesus' sacrifice. That's just silly!

Gazing at the cross long enough also throws the resurrection into sharp relief. Jesus came back from the dead in power and in might, changing the timid cowards the disciples had become into the bold life-risking proclaimers that we know them as today. It was Christ's resurrection that changed that! Just when they thought they had all been wrong, in the "All Is Lost" moment of all of history, Jesus bursts into the scene, back from the dead. This is glorious! We can live our lives within that victory- nothing, not even death, can stop us!

In light of all the above musing, as I was driving home listening to the radio, numerous songs that said "life is hard but trust in God and it'll be okay" didn't seem to have much weight to them... [Not to say that they don't serve a purpose, I like to think that any given one of those songs has been heard by many people who needed that message spoken into their life. God is the the God of Comfort, working all things for our good, don't forget all of that.] But when it comes to worship, we are doing something wrong if we don't worship in view of the cross. Our worship should always have less "Lord, please help me with this problem/pain/issue" and more "Jesus, I am in awe of your sacrifice." As always, when I speak of worship I don't mean songs alone (I'll make a blog post on this soon), but I refer to how we can use everything we do to glorify God. If we go about our lives trying to glorify him without being constantly aware of his great sacrifice and equally great victory, we miss something beautiful.

The cross and its magnitude show us God's love for us: unfathomable, indescribable, infinite, and infinitely wonderful.


You may have noticed that this blog post has stolen the title of a well-known hymn. God laid it upon my heart as I mused at the foot of the cross:


I stand amazed in the presence of Jesus the Nazarene
And wonder how he could love me, a sinner, condemned, unclean
How marvelous, how wonderful!
My song shall ever be:
How marvelous, how wonderful
Is my Savior's love for me!


Let's take some time to stand amazed.